Wearing The Outfits of ‘Life’

June 1, 2008 | By More

Sometimes my life resembles an outfit put together by a four year old. What’s frustrating is I keep putting on the same cowboy boots, plaid shorts, and sombrero. You would think I would learn from my mistakes.

Let me stop here for a moment and make sure you all know that I am speaking figuratively. I would never –well, maybe ‘never’ is too strong a word — actually wear on outfit like that. Now back to my figurative speech.

When I have chosen the mismatched life issues, I understand that I look like an idiot (more accurately, feel like an idiot). There are times, however, when I have no say in what I am “wearing”. During those times I just want to look up to heaven and say, “God have you ever heard of this thing called Garanimals?” I swear someone up there is not checking the tags before they start throwing some issues my way. Okay, maybe He is.

I am sure God knows if my “clothes” matched all the time, I would never become the person He desires me to be. You see pride is always lurking around the corner and for some reason, I apparently think I look awesome wearing it. So, with that in mind, I will joyfully (or attempt joyfully to) accept some outrageous outfits with a hint of heaven in them.

Let me describe one outfit for you. It looks like this, “college freshman orientation, speeding ticket court date, and high school graduation all in one week” in that order. I guarantee there was no matching game going on when these events were put together. However, we are promised that all things work together for good so you just gotta step out on faith.

Just having my son graduate has been overwhelming. You would think since I have already watched one son navigate this transition from high school to college, I could actually wear this outfit with flare. Just the opposite is true.

It was okay when Adrin graduated because he was the oldest; he was suppose to graduate. Somehow, in my mind Dillon and Payton were always the little boys. I just kept thinking I would have a lot more time with them and now the days are slipping through my hands like sand.

It could also have something do with the fact that Dillon is going to Oklahoma State University where we know no one. Panic is setting in at this very moment. I don’t wear panic well; it clashes with my skin tone.

This leads me to freshman orientation. We were encouraged to sign Dillon up as early as possible for freshman orientation, so we did.

Somehow, it didn’t click that traveling to Oklahoma four days BEFORE his high school graduation might not be such a great idea. I mean, how many kids go through freshman orientation before they graduate? It just feels wrong. I am really not wearing that well. Just the thought of planning a trip to Stillwater, Okla., working full time, and making sure my house is ready for family arriving to attend graduation makes me nauseous. The accessories in this outfit are killing me. Can you see the mis-matched patterns yet?

Well, if you cannot see it then maybe this last piece of fabric, which ties this hideous ensemble together, will bring things into focus.

My youngest son, Payton, has a court date for his recent speeding ticket. The court date is May 20, the day of Dillon’s freshman orientation. I will have one child registering for college classes and another registering for defensive driving. What a fabulous day. Can a mother get any prouder?

Actually if truth be told, I am going to see if we can change the court date. I think that at least one of his parents should be in town for this monumental event.

As I write this column, I keep hearing in my head, the Sesame Street song, “One of these things is not like the others. One of these things just doesn’t belong.”

My problem is none of these things are alike or belongs. What’s a girl to do? As much as I try to make this outfit make sense, it just won’t.

Some of you may be saying, “Just change your clothes”. Fortunately, there are those who understand no matter how much I may want to change them, I can’t.

This is the point where I surrender and accept that the cowboy boots, plaid shorts, and sombrero are a means to an end. If a girl has to look a little wacko on the outside so God can do his work on the inside, then I say ‘bring on the polyester!’ God, you do know I was kidding about the Polyester…

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Category: Every Day Life

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