‘Blessed’ Condo Hopping: A Change in Prayers

June 1, 2007 | By More

Something was said during spring break that has taken up residence in my heart. It’s profound how one comment can stop you in your tracks. All of a sudden, you begin to look at things differently.

While on spring break in Colorado, Cindy Chaffin and I were “condo hopping” one night to chat with our friends. We stopped by Stan and Kim Bradley’s condo.

If I remember correctly it was our last night before the long trip home. Everyone was trying to consume or give away food – we always bring too much food. Stan’s tactic was to persuade us we needed cheese and crackers. In the midst of “you have to try this cheese, it’s so good” I asked Kim about their daughter Rachel’s approaching wedding.

We discussed all the decisions that must be made and how overwhelming it can be. Then of course we talked about the groom. The typical questions, “Where is he from? Do you like him?”

Like a good father, Stan interjected enthusiastically, “He has a job!” We all laughed.

I remembered that my husband did not have a job when he proposed to me. This was of great concern to my mother. My father had passed away, but I am certain this would have troubled him as well.

Thankfully, all that worry was unfounded. I did make a mental note, though. I should absolutely encourage my boys to be gainfully employed before they propose to anyone. Their future in-laws will be much happier that way.

Kim then said something that pierced my heart. Oprah calls it “a light bulb moment.”

Kim seemed so reassured in knowing she would be handing-over her daughter to a young man who was perfect for Rachel. Even his parents and siblings were a perfect fit.

Kim went on to say, she really shouldn’t be so surprised. She had prayed for God to provide this kind of husband for Rachel. We joked how sometimes we get caught saying “I can’t believe it worked out so well” when it is exactly what we asked God to do. God’s answer to their prayer was this young man.

That’s when it hit me. Would my boys someday be an answer to some mother and father’s prayer for their daughter?

I had never really thought about it that way. I have spent my time focused on asking God to provide my children with the right spouse. It never occurred to me to ask God to make them the perfect spouse for someone else.

It gave a whole new perspective to what I was doing in preparing them for the role of husband and father? Was it enough? Was there something I should be doing that I wasn’t?

So many questions and doubts swirled in my head. Was I up to the task of raising “answers to prayers?” Heavens no! God alone is capable of taking my efforts and making them complete. However, I have become more attentive to my role in this process.

Fortunately there are a few things I can check off my “prepare boys for marriage” list. All three know how to wash clothes, load and empty a dishwasher, clean a bathroom, change bed sheets and take care of the yard. My eldest is good to go in this area. Getting the younger two to do these things, without being asked or threatened with bodily harm, is the dilemma.

Good luck girls.

Donald Bentley is the best thing my future daughter-in-laws have going for them. The boys laughed (a lot) when they read that sentence, but someday they will realize how true it is.

Their dad is utterly and madly in love with his wife and children. Not one of us doubts his willingness to lay down his life for us. Donald has often said if there was no one else in the world but me, Adrin, Dillon, and Payton, he would be perfectly content.

My children have grown-up watching a man who is a devoted husband and father. His example should go a long way in helping them do the same one day. Most importantly Donald has taught them how to deal with a woman or how not to deal with a woman. Both are important to know!

There is still much to do on my “prepare boys for marriage” list, but it will start with me. From now on there will be a new request when I am praying for my future daughter-in-laws. I will be praying that my boys become wonderful son-in-laws as well.

Kim had no idea how her comments would touch my heart. I had no idea “condo hopping” would be such a blessing.

 

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